1. I am suppose to be sleeping now but no,I am filled with anxiety about my ICA tomorrow and it's the first day of school technically speaking.I am often described as ''emo'' but I think I am just a little on the melancholic side. I am lost in my own thoughts very often. I am not really an introvert but I only open up to people whom I want to. Not really much of a people person but being alone scares me so I would rather be with people most of the times.
2. I would love to open up and be adventurous in life but heck no,I'm way too lazy and fearful to try out new things so I'm still stuck in my own circle that I drew myself. I would love love love to have a fashion blog and you know,start my own vlogs and stuff but heck no,I'm too lazy to learn video editing and I'm way tooooooo shy. Actually not really shy ah,like just afraid of what people would say HAHAHAHA.
3.I have very low self esteem about my looks and intellect and I'm really lost in life like now. Yes now.
4.It's supposed to be 10 facts about myself but I should head to bed because I'm suppose to wake up at 9am tomorrow but I'm here because I'm so angsty about my ICA and they said writing is suppose to be therapeutic so I'm here. Goodnight and one more week to July!
Ps.Had to went back and edit the title because I put 3 things i want to say right now instead of 4. LOLOLOL okay goodnight for real.
Contrary to the picture,I am not a sophisticated person. I am a clumsy dwarf and my English is often ridiculed in real life. Thank god for internet.
Monday, June 24, 2013
Thursday, June 20, 2013
Was suppose to meet QE at 1pm but he just woke up so I ... spent like 1 hour in the library.
My cheese sausage prata! We had a food trip at upper thomson road hehe. His treat as an apology cause he's late!
His icecream with waffle! Peppermint with dont know what icecream and chocolate lolz.
My salted caramel icecream with rum and raisin icecream and marshmellow toppings! The price is not that expensive as I thought it would be! But no idea why my chocolate sauce become maple syrup sauce! I couldn't finish the waffle in the end! Was too full thanks to the prata lolz.
The pink one damn awkward and gay lah but I took it lah cause its damn awkward for a guy to have a pink polariod lolz. Yay I'm wearing my new denim skirt I bought at Bugis yesterday. Just realise I keep wearing this black top Lucinda gave because it's super easy to match. Okay good time catching up with this JC kid today bye
Sunday, June 16, 2013
If you believe you won't fall,you won't
All these years,when things goes awry,you're the always the very first person that comes to my mind to look for comfort. There are times I still hesitate because you moved on and so do I. But then I remember you told me you would always be there so sometimes I just put my pride down and allow myself to be vulnerable and tell you what's wrong because you always make me feel better without fail.
''Just hang on and don't be afraid. If you believe you won't fall,you won't.You are my only source of random annoyance.Keep that in mind. ''
If only I had make a much more rationale choice that year,maybe things would have been different but then again,who knows what would happen?
''Random annoyance. That's what we are was and always been.''
''Just hang on and don't be afraid. If you believe you won't fall,you won't.You are my only source of random annoyance.Keep that in mind. ''
If only I had make a much more rationale choice that year,maybe things would have been different but then again,who knows what would happen?
''Random annoyance. That's what we are was and always been.''
Saturday, June 15, 2013
Dengue Fever
As suggested by the title,the answer is YES. I got dengue fever. The area around my neighborhood is a red spot.
On Friday,I was feeling extremely uncomfortable and I couldn't wait for marketing to end because I have a horrible migraine. I thought it's pretty normal because Marketing always seems to give me a headache. However,it got worst in the late afternoon when I was drenched on my way to the MRT station.
I went out that day and had dinner with NPL as I thought it will pass.
My fever refuse to subside and I went to see my family doctor on Sunday. He told me it might be a case of dengue as I have no cough and flu. I had instructions to head to the hospital on Tuesday if it had not subside till then.
I would wake up everyday around dawn with a horrendous migraine and my fever which subsided will raise back.
On Tuesday late afternoon,I went to KTPH A and E. My fever hadn't subside and I waited for hours and hours before the proper treatment. It was air-conditioned and it was very cold for me. Kaifeng came down to keep me company and bring me food. I had blood test and the doctor put me on drip and gave me fever medicine.
I was actually suppose to meet Shahira and Zaidi for a movie but we ended up meeting in KTPH instead. Zaidi was there for his internship interview.
I was out of KTPH around 9plus. Blood palette was around 138. It dropped to 124 yesterday when I visited the doctor yesterday. Bounced back to 160 today. No more fever and discomfort yay :-)
The worst part of dengue is the itch,it can really make you go crazy! Furthermore,my skin feels super sandy and red!
BIG THANKYOU to Yunxuan for accompanying me to the polyclinic yesterday and Kaifeng for coming down on Tuesday and waking up early today just to accompany me hehe.
Thanks all for your concern and let's fight the mosquitos together! Do your part by removing all sources of stagnant water! If you notice any rashes on your body and have prolonged fever,please visit a doctor immediately!
On Friday,I was feeling extremely uncomfortable and I couldn't wait for marketing to end because I have a horrible migraine. I thought it's pretty normal because Marketing always seems to give me a headache. However,it got worst in the late afternoon when I was drenched on my way to the MRT station.
I went out that day and had dinner with NPL as I thought it will pass.
My fever refuse to subside and I went to see my family doctor on Sunday. He told me it might be a case of dengue as I have no cough and flu. I had instructions to head to the hospital on Tuesday if it had not subside till then.
I would wake up everyday around dawn with a horrendous migraine and my fever which subsided will raise back.
On Tuesday late afternoon,I went to KTPH A and E. My fever hadn't subside and I waited for hours and hours before the proper treatment. It was air-conditioned and it was very cold for me. Kaifeng came down to keep me company and bring me food. I had blood test and the doctor put me on drip and gave me fever medicine.
I was actually suppose to meet Shahira and Zaidi for a movie but we ended up meeting in KTPH instead. Zaidi was there for his internship interview.
I was out of KTPH around 9plus. Blood palette was around 138. It dropped to 124 yesterday when I visited the doctor yesterday. Bounced back to 160 today. No more fever and discomfort yay :-)
The worst part of dengue is the itch,it can really make you go crazy! Furthermore,my skin feels super sandy and red!
BIG THANKYOU to Yunxuan for accompanying me to the polyclinic yesterday and Kaifeng for coming down on Tuesday and waking up early today just to accompany me hehe.
Thanks all for your concern and let's fight the mosquitos together! Do your part by removing all sources of stagnant water! If you notice any rashes on your body and have prolonged fever,please visit a doctor immediately!
Friday, June 7, 2013
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
Appreciation
We always thought our own problems are the greatest.Maybe we are too caught up with our own lives,too obsessed with ourselves sometimes to even ... care about what other problems people are facing. Because all these things didn't happen to us personally,we brushed them aside. But please bear in mind,it could be you in the future. Unfortunate things can happen to anyone,anytime.
In actual fact,a lot of things seemed like problems to me. I am a worry wart and I have very bad anxiety problems. Extremely small problems can be like a humongous bomb to me,ready to explode in my mind anytime,any moment.
I watched happy truck yesterday and I'm really in awe of those parents who didn't give up on their kids. It seemed so hard to have a normal life when your children isn't normal.You face judgement from the society,your child faces judgment from the society and maybe even despise. There's the finance part to think about and there's so much more to weigh on your mind every single day.
How do they do it?
Immense love for the child and courage I suppose. ''Sometimes it's really tiring.. It's more of the psychological part I think.'' One of the mothers choked out before bursting into tears. At that moment,I feel like crying with her but I didn't because my dad was making a joke about the celebrities pretending to cry...... But really lah,it's a little too exaggerated.
Today I was waiting for bus 812 to bring me to ChongPang and I heard this woman crying and talking loudly behind me. ''How dare you scold me? You scolded me?!I want to go home right now! I don't want to go for the operation! Do you know afraid I am? Do you know how much emotional trauma I've been through?I might just go in there and never come out! I can't even sleep yesterday!'' she exclaimed in extreme anguish. I'm guessing that perhaps her daughter has spoken to her in a harsher tone and she wasn't too happy about it.
No adult in their right mind would cry loudly in public. There was just so much fear in her voice and it made my fear for microsoft access seems so stupid and small.
While I was waiting for a bus,she was waiting for hope. Hope to survive the operation and see her loved ones when she open her eyes again.
While I was battling with anxiety issues,she was battling with an unknown monster called death.
So therefore,I am lucky. You are lucky too.You are healthy and alive and breathing.
On a side note,I lost my ez-link card today and ... I feel so unlucky but it's probably due to my careless and blur personality. But I'm lucky,it's not my phone or IC that is missing! So thankful that BY and N accompanied me to search even though they can go home first. :D
I know my blogposts hadn't exactly been interesting to read because it's like this naggy person who keeps preaching about life but yeah this is just a platform for me to view out things which no one really wants to listen in reality and so I just type out whatever I wanna tell someone here. It's just like talking to myself lah and I enjoy it because .... I love myself like that.
Have a good night sleep everyone! :)
In actual fact,a lot of things seemed like problems to me. I am a worry wart and I have very bad anxiety problems. Extremely small problems can be like a humongous bomb to me,ready to explode in my mind anytime,any moment.
I watched happy truck yesterday and I'm really in awe of those parents who didn't give up on their kids. It seemed so hard to have a normal life when your children isn't normal.You face judgement from the society,your child faces judgment from the society and maybe even despise. There's the finance part to think about and there's so much more to weigh on your mind every single day.
How do they do it?
Immense love for the child and courage I suppose. ''Sometimes it's really tiring.. It's more of the psychological part I think.'' One of the mothers choked out before bursting into tears. At that moment,I feel like crying with her but I didn't because my dad was making a joke about the celebrities pretending to cry...... But really lah,it's a little too exaggerated.
Today I was waiting for bus 812 to bring me to ChongPang and I heard this woman crying and talking loudly behind me. ''How dare you scold me? You scolded me?!I want to go home right now! I don't want to go for the operation! Do you know afraid I am? Do you know how much emotional trauma I've been through?I might just go in there and never come out! I can't even sleep yesterday!'' she exclaimed in extreme anguish. I'm guessing that perhaps her daughter has spoken to her in a harsher tone and she wasn't too happy about it.
No adult in their right mind would cry loudly in public. There was just so much fear in her voice and it made my fear for microsoft access seems so stupid and small.
While I was waiting for a bus,she was waiting for hope. Hope to survive the operation and see her loved ones when she open her eyes again.
While I was battling with anxiety issues,she was battling with an unknown monster called death.
So therefore,I am lucky. You are lucky too.You are healthy and alive and breathing.
On a side note,I lost my ez-link card today and ... I feel so unlucky but it's probably due to my careless and blur personality. But I'm lucky,it's not my phone or IC that is missing! So thankful that BY and N accompanied me to search even though they can go home first. :D
I know my blogposts hadn't exactly been interesting to read because it's like this naggy person who keeps preaching about life but yeah this is just a platform for me to view out things which no one really wants to listen in reality and so I just type out whatever I wanna tell someone here. It's just like talking to myself lah and I enjoy it because .... I love myself like that.
Have a good night sleep everyone! :)
Thursday, May 23, 2013
You know when people gives you words of affirmation?
Sometimes they are just words with no meanings whereby people mumble or words that slipped out to make you feel better.
I remember feeling very lousy in the bus that day 3 years ago and I could still feel and see those words on my screen,''you are worth it.''
It was so real and I bet you can never believe how I felt that moment
It was like someone believed in me for real.
It was words that tumbled out with no hidden motives
words that spiraled an emotion so intense
words so sincere could feel it in your bones
words that actually that lessen the burden of your
b r o k e n
s c a t t e r e d
s o u l
Sometimes they are just words with no meanings whereby people mumble or words that slipped out to make you feel better.
I remember feeling very lousy in the bus that day 3 years ago and I could still feel and see those words on my screen,''you are worth it.''
It was so real and I bet you can never believe how I felt that moment
It was like someone believed in me for real.
It was words that tumbled out with no hidden motives
words that spiraled an emotion so intense
words so sincere could feel it in your bones
words that actually that lessen the burden of your
b r o k e n
s c a t t e r e d
s o u l
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